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Yeah I'm still alive.

by Toshubi

Had someone ask if I was still around. The answer is "Yes." but not active.
Got tired of all the hate and meanness I got, so I've just stopped posting here.

I when I do art I don't post it here but in all honesty I don't do much anymore. It doesn't bring me any happiness anymore.

All my friends have died over the last 12 years, my dad died on the 27th of last month and I almost lost my mom too. (Covid 19 Delta.)

Focusing more on making real human face to face connections now rather than fake electronic ones over the web.

But I'm still around, mostly reading comics and enjoying art that can only be found here... till some fucking bureaucrat forces this site to shut down or change it's TOS.

Viewed:	144 times
Added:	2 years, 9 months ago 05 Aug 2021 07:18 CEST

13 Comments on this Journal

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ElfenSciuridae

2 years, 9 months ago

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Sorry to hear of you losses and your ordeals with the trolls that seen to reek about the place. All I can offer is a hug for your loss - electronic or not, I consider you as a few of my friends through the art you do is so amazing. Hope your endeavors in making new friends is successful. We are all in the same boat dealing with this situation.

As for the trolls - you can not give them an inch of your attention or they will take that and try to make your life miserable. I have dealt with them here and elsewhere, and even had one of them threaten me here on PM, claiming he knows who I am personally and where I live. I told him that he can come and try something, because 1) I'm armed with a firearm and 2) since I helped so many people in my area as a local self -imposed hero, that people watch over me and protect me from what harm comes my way. It's been 5 weeks, and I'm still waiting for that a-hole to come knock on my door.

When a troll comes and tries to belittle me, my work and/or the friends I keep, I tell them "Lets see you do better. Oh, you got a blank page of Zero Art? Then you can't say jack shit because being able to create something from nothing is better than having nothing at all and all you seem to have is nothing." In short, I take the situation they throw at me and turn it about and mush it in their faces. trolls, like bullies, do not like being somebody who stands up to them. They do not like to be reminded that their world is so small and little with the nothing they created because they wasted time in bullying others. They do not like to be reminded that their parents were their first teachers and they lack a lot in education and interpersonal skills. They hate being reminded that without the trolling and bullying, they have nothing to show for their lives - and that is sad. People like that after you put them in their place, you walk away from and ignore them for the rest of eternity.

If you do not post your art ever again, I and many like me will miss you. But I (hopefully we all do) understand that times right now is not easy and we need a break from it all. Hopefully things will improve in a few months. Hope to seeing your (and everyone else making the sme decision you did) will start posting art again after when all said and done with this pandemic.

Take care. Until we next meet electronically.

caldaq

2 years, 9 months ago

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I enjoyed your work when yu were posting i'm sorry yo've had such A crappy experience here.

soggymaster

2 years, 9 months ago

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Sad to hear your art drive has died.
Glad to hear you're still okay, even though I can absolutely tell that you're struggling.

Netreek

2 years, 9 months ago

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Damn. That sucks. Specially with the C-Delta. I hope your mom gets better. Its sad not to see you anymore. :( I agree to Elfen. Ignore those trolling morons.

KillaLotus119

2 years, 9 months ago

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Oh damn I'm sorry to hear all that. Don't blame you for focusing more on face to face than online interactions but as for the trolls they are just pathetic wastes who are so miserable they have to try and bring others down

VernonOnFM

2 years, 9 months ago

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It is good to hear from you again, Tosh. I am sorry to hear about your losses, I know how it feels to lose a parent and it is indeed tough. I'm glad I got to meet you in-person, it was one of my favorite things to do on that vacation I took. With or without art, I still consider you to be a friend, and am here if you ever want to talk about anything.

beatadalhagen

2 years, 9 months ago

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Aw man, good to hear from you though.

LemmyNiscuit

2 years, 9 months ago

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Yeah... Doesn't help SoFurry changed their TOS and impacted us. Feels like it's just on borrowed time.

LoneWolf23k

2 years, 9 months ago

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Sorry to hear about your woes. We miss you, man.

Ratzmaus

2 years, 9 months ago

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That's just extremely saddening to hear, your dad was a great man. My deepest condolences Toshi...
I hope your mom comes through alright and there won't be lasting side effects.

rmccool

2 years, 9 months ago

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hugs..

talon2point0

2 years, 9 months ago

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Sorry my guy.

thefrenchbunny

2 years, 9 months ago

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as an avid fan of mhall I'm going to say that I'm really going to miss your comics but ^^ I'm happy to hear you are well and focusing on your IRL life. I hope that things only get better for you from here so even if you don't draw or post anymore please keep on keeping on. I'm sorry to hear about your losses as well so please take any and all time you need even if it is eternity ^^. no matter what happens I want to thank you for the years of enjoyment I've gotten from looking at your art and reading your stories.

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