As Ash sauntered his way down the street, he was leaning so far back that he might have fallen over. But how else was he supposed to sun himself while he walked? It didn't matter that the city was falling apart around him, under attack from some megalomaniacal villain or another; today was his day off. The leopard veered his way around open manhole covers, pirouetted around pools of melted tarmac and concrete, and limboed over a pair of fleeing boars who were inexplicably carrying a grand piano. He didn't even open his eyes to see where he was going. It was as easy as breathing to him. After all, him wandering through the chaotic streets without even noticing was the funniest possible outcome - the only outcome a toon like him could ever accept.
He had only one goal in mind - get to the beach. Today was a beach day. And nothing was gonna get in the way of that
In spite of the chaos happening in the city, the beach was quite busy with sunbathers and beach-bums. There was still plenty of space for him to sprawl out with his towel, and start applying some lotion to soften his fur and keep himself cool.
Just as he was shaking the bottle and positioning it over his hand, he got distracted. Ash caught a glimpse of a voluptuous arctic fox walking by, each step making one foot cross over the other like the sultry movements of a supermodel. Ash kept squeezing his bottle of lotion, even as he was frozen in place, letting it pool into his open paw like a dollop of mayo. She turned back to look at him briefly, her full red lips pursed in a pout, her eyes shadowed a deep blue shade. She turned and continued to walk, the shake of her hips making Ash's heart bang like a bass drum.
After a moment of paralysis, the leopard went absolutely ga-ga.
Ash's eyes bulged out of his head, first. He leaned forward, his eyes growing wider, pulsing and throbbing in time with his heart, which was currently trying to escape his chest. His jaw fell open, crashing into the sand with a metallic clang. He immediately started shovelling fistful after fistful of sand into it, before biting down hard. His head turned bright red, whistling like a boiling kettle, before he pursed his lips and blew a bubble of molten yellow sand. The sand congealed to create a big crystal-glass heart. He grabbed it in both hands and scrambled to his feet, his legs digging a deep trench in the ground. His tongue wagged like a dog's, and his eyes had turned into big pink hearts. He was smitten, primed to give chase after the vixen.
Just as he took off, though, he was intercepted. A long squirrel tail wrapped tightly around his neck, coiling and coiling until his neck was stretched out a full extra foot.
``GLKL!'' Ash scrabbled at the air, dropping the glass sculpture onto the sand. He was squeezed tighter, making the sound of a squeaky toy. ``H-Hey Jenny...''
``That's Diamond Tail to you. Just what do you think you're doing?'' The squirrel had her hands on her hips, looking right into Ash's eyes with very apparent annoyance. ``We've got an emergency! All hands on deck!''
``Buh-but...`` Ash croaked. ``It'thh my day offfth....''
``Oh, really.'' Jenny's arms were crossed. ``That's not a great excuse.. You didn't bring your gloves with you?''
``N-no mitthh...'' Ash was still scrabbling.
``What were you even looking at, anyway?''
Jenny looked past Ash, to see the vixen was looking back at her. Said vixen smiled, waving and wiggling her fingers, and gave a little wink.
The squirrel was frozen in place, her eyes wide. Her tail suddenly relaxed, letting Ash fall and embed his entire body in the dunes, save for his head.
Jenny's snout pushed out and her ears elongated as she suddenly changed from a squirrel into a wolf. She buried her fingers in the corners of her mouth and let out a shrill whistle, before bellowing and howling. Then her tail wrapped tightly around her body as she stamped her foot on the ground like a jackhammer, embedding Ash's head deeper into the ground.
When the stamping stopped, she stood stock still. Her tail started to spark and fizz, burning away like a fuse on a stick of dynamite until it reached the base of her spine.. She shot into the air with a start, screaming like a firework and exploding overhead in a shower of green, blue and white sparks. From that explosion, she floated down like a feather, landing right next to Ash on her stomach, her head resting on her elbows.
``Wowie-zowie...'' Jenny sighed. ``I don't blame you at all...''
``Riiiight?'' Ash mewled. ``Don't ya have a mission though?''
``Mission? What mission?''
The vixen seemed to enjoy their attention, fluttering her eyelids like the shutter of a paparazzi's camera and beckoning to them again.
``Oh, mercy me~'' she called out, waving to the pair. ``If only someone could help me set up my umbrella...''
The squirrel and the leopard slid towards her like fish on an invisible line, both of them wearing dreamlike smiles. As they neared her, they slithered up off the sand and surrounded her on both sides. Ash and Jenny shot dagger-filled glares at each other, growling and frothing at the mouth like rabid canines.
``Oh, well, I suppose many hands make light work~!'' the fox giggled, tracing her fingers along both her admirer's stomachs. They draped over her and wrapped around her like pair of fine scarves, making her look like a beautiful starlet.
``Ah, you're both so very very kind...'' she sighed. ``You make a girl feel like a queen...''
All of a sudden, she was gone. The two fell over, flat on their faces, before whipping back upright to hear the sounds of their love interest screaming at the top of her lungs. Her arms were wobbling like noodles as she was being carried away, fire-man style, by another vixen. This one had orange fur, a green tail tip, and dark eyes.
``Awwwww, did I steal your girlfriend?'' She grinned a big, impish grin, pressed the thumb of her free hand to her nose, and blew a raspberry.
``Come n' get her, ya maroons!'' she cackled.
Ash and Jenny stomped in the sand and shook a fist in the air.
``Stooormwaaaaaave!'' they yelled in perfect unison, their voices inflecting upwards into a roar.
Jenny's tail flattened and hardened, and Ash leapt onto it, it tensed and bent underneath him like a diving board, before flinging him through the air with a vibrating thwungungungungung.
As Ash soared after the pair, his snarl became a bright wide eyed gasp of recognition - he didn't have his gloves, and he was down to his skivvies! An idea occurred to him and a lightbulb went off above his head. He reached up, grabbed it, and smashed it open. Sure enough, a pair of his blue doodad-gloves were waiting, ready for him to put them on and get down to work. They slid onto his wrists, and he pointed them directly towards the fleeing fox. Closing one eye and sticking out his tongue, he wiggled his fingers and sought a connection with something that could slow her down.
A large boom box next to a group of topless muscular frat dogs was a good place to start. Strings' strings shot into it, impaling it and making it pump up its volume to a ludicrous degree. It blasted a shock-wave of bass-hosted air towards Stormwave. She managed to evade, but the captive vixen got her hair blown back by the force of it, and slumped over Stormwave's back, dizzy, unconscious and smiling. Ash winced sympathetically.
As his trajectory started to dip, he remembered that he couldn't fly. He scrabbled at the air as he tumbled towards the ground. He saw the big rock approaching his face just before he impacted it, embedded up to his neck and swinging like a planted javelin.
Jenny raced past him, running like an Olympian as she gained ground. Her tail whipped out, with a sharp whp-crak to match it. It snapped at Stormwave's heels, and she yelped and leapt off the ground like a spurned hound, but kept her pace up as the chase took them off the beach and onto concrete.
``Pleeeeease, saaaaave meeee!'' The white-furred vixen cried out, her fists beating ineffectually on Stormwave's back.
``Don't worry, honey! I got ya!'' Stormwave swung her around to her front, with one arm under her legs and the other around her shoulders. Just ahead of her was a motorcycle; her getaway vehicle, for sure.
Jenny leapt into the air and landed on the tip of her tail. It coiled and tensed like a spring, and she bounced forward. Each jump took her further than the last, until she was able to vault right over Stormwave's head and land right on top of the motorcycle. It smashed into a pancake underneath her as she landed right in front of Stormwave.
The vixen skidded to a halt, her eyes wide with terror and shock.
``Jenny...'' she said. Her voice sounded different all of a sudden. ``Come on, snap out of this! This isn't you!''
``That's Diamond Tail to you, Stormwave!'' Jenny jabbed a finger in her direction, her whole body broadening and growing in size. ``Now unhand her!''
``Her?!'' Stormwave. glanced at the whimpering white fox in her arms. ``This isn't a -``
Jenny had heard enough. She wound up her fist, and swung it in an uppercut (BIFF!) that sent Stormwave shooting and screaming into the sky. Her boots were left behind, as was her captive. Jenny scooped her out of the air and swung her into a dipped tango position.
``My hero...'' the vixen said, her eyes fluttering, her hands resting on her cheeks. Jenny puckered up and went in for a kiss. To her surprise, the fox got there first. The squirrel's legs twisted into a helix, her tail curled into a knot, and her eyes turned into big throbbing hearts.
The leopard caught up to the pair, his face encased in a piece of boulder. His arms were out in front as he groped blindly at the air.
``A little help here?!'' He asked, though the sound was muffled beyond any recognition. ``What's going on out there? Helloooo?''
Diamond Tail's tailtip gave him a few hard taps on the head, and the boulder broke in two. He shook his head, blubbering, stars and winged boulders still floating around his head.
``Whasshappening...?'' He slurred, wearing a punch-drunk, broken-toothed smile. ``Where'sss Wavestorm? Lemme'at'er, I'll give her such'a-``
``....aaaaaAAAAAARGH!''
Ash served as a perfect cushion for Stormwave's fall, bouncing off him and landing just in front of him. Little dancing vixens joined the boulders and the stars swirling around his woozy head. He looked into Stormwave's eyes, his own spinning. In Ash's swimming vision, Stormwave's orange fur turned white, and his pupils turned into hearts once again.
``Heyyyy beach babe,'' he slurred. ``Y'ok?'' He puckered up his lips for a big kiss, his lips ballooning to the size of his face. Stormwave managed to pull back.
``Strings... you're st-stronger than this...''
``Man, I must'a clocked her good!'' Jenny laughed between kisses. ``Mwah-mwah-mwah... she's talking crazy talk. But she can do all the ramblin' she wants in the slammer anyway.''
``I don't want her goin' t'prison,'' Ash said, slithering along the ground like an inchworm. ``She's so pretty...''
-
Zyla's confusion was graduating into uncanny dread. She'd never seen her fellow heroes act quite this stupidly before.
Why was Ash contorting himself on the ground with that dumb look in his eyes? Why was Jenny making out with the cylindrical safe she'd worked so hard to steal back? Why were they acting like they had come straight out of a cartoon?
She was sure she knew the answer, and she was lucky she'd remembered to tweak the implants on her temples before venturing into the strange technicolour dome that had taken up a huge chunk of the seafront. They siphoned off some of the galvanic electricity roiling through her body to keep her focused, and to keep her perception firmly rooted in reality. If only Ash and Jenny had safeguards of their own...
At least they seemed distracted right now. She had to beat a hasty retreat. She scrambled up to her feet and took off into a run. It'd take her some time to get out on foot, but if she moved quickly, maybe she could escape and get some reinforcements. Whoever was behind this was frighteningly well-prepared, that much was certain.
Strangely enough, the MO reminded her of someone too. An old friend of hers. Almost an old flame, too...
The way her fellow heroes were behaving reminded her of being a kid, and the old cartoons she used to watch on Saturday nights when she and her friends were staying up way too late on a sleepover.
The idea that it was her seemed so absurd though... it couldn't be. Could it?
``Zyla?''
It could, and it was.
Stormwave turned to face the sound of the voice, and found herself staring at a very familiar lynx. She was taller than her, the way she'd always been. Far more muscular now. She was adorned with pink goggles over her eyes, an impish toothy grin, and the sort of punky outfit she wore when she met Zyla on break from college.
It was her...
The recognition dawned on the villainous lynx's face, and she was positively beaming.
``Holy shit!'' Zaide grinned from ear to ear. ``Zyla! It is you! Holy shit!!! That outfit looks incredible! I didn't know you were Stormwave!''
``I didn't know you were... whatever you are.'' In any other situation, Zyla would be beaming from ear to ear. But instead, she felt dread, and a tight, knotting twist in her stomach. She couldn't think of a worse way to have a reunion.
``Well... this is awesome!'' Zaide rested her hands on her hips, leaving herself wide open. ``I was thinking about you, you know... when I came back home, I went to your old home just to see if anyone was still there. Your mom's-``
Zyla heard enough. With a scream, she thrust her palms forward. An ozone stench and a crackling snap preceded ten glowing tendrils of lightning, blasting into Zaide's body. She screamed with shock and pain. It only lasted about a fraction of a second, but it was long enough to make the lynx collapse to the ground, conscious but incapacitated.
``What did you do to her.'' Zyla approached the prone lynx, a grim scowl on her face.
``Nothing.''
The sound came from above her. She looked up, and there was Zaide, floating in the air. A second, or the original? Judging from the way her palms glowed pink, and little illusory strings were trailing down to the prone ``Zaide''... she was probably the original.
``I definitely didn't attack her, the way you just did to me. Or, well, the puppet I had standing in for me.''
``This time I've got you,'' Zyla said, going for a second electrifying attack. Zaide fell to the ground, slumping over her impostor. Or... no, that wasn't Zaide. Neither of them were. The lizard slumped on top of the mink was familiar, too. Wasn't he one of those rookie heroes who was still getting used to his powers...? She didn't even know his name.
That illusion had fooled her, even with her implants.
``Alright, clearly you're not in the mood for a chat, so let's get to the point.''
Zaide was right behind her. Good. Zyla's powers worked better up close. She wheeled around, but when she thrust her hands forward, they sparked with useless little whining fireworks. Not only that, her gloves seemed to have grown a size or two, with comically large fingers.
She missed the sound of the first snap when she whirled around. The second snap rocketed through her mind and scrambled her thoughts. She stumbled on the spot, staring right into Zaide's smug, sexy face. Behind Zaide, the whole world was changing. It was becoming more saturated and colourful, the buildings starting to bend and curve as though made of rubber. Her legs and arms felt thinner too, more elastic, and with that came a feeling of absolute relaxation and freedom.
``You resisted a little longer than the others,'' Zaide said, her voice dripping with praise that only had a tiny tinge of patronisation. ``Good job! That's the strong-willed bestie I always knew. Even so... you never stood a chance."
Another snap. The sound of a whirring twinkling theremin whirled through her head, a repetitive wooobwoooobwooob. With it, Zaide's eyes swirled. Pink and black pinwheels, thick swirling whirlpools like acrylic paint swirling down a drain. Zyla could feel her eyes tingling and bulging out of her head. She must have looked so stupid right now.
To the left and right of the Lynx, Jenny and Ash emerged to flank her, smiling those happy-go-lucky smiles of theirs, their fists pressed against their hips as they watched her sink. While her gaze was glued to Zaide's eyes, Jenny could still perceive them. She wanted to be exactly like them. She was on her way already...
``I've been on a cartoon kick, can ya tell?'' Zaide giggled. ``You're gonna have so much more fun as a toony minion, without being bogged down by such silly things like gravity and reality....''
Another snap sent another spark of pink through her eyes, and through Zyla's body. It pulled the dazed vixen deeper into the fantastical fugue. Her body felt so elastic and light. A strange feeling of euphoric liberty filled her inside and out. Zyla could feel herself falling. Not just into the illusion, not just into the eyes, but into her. She felt lighter than air - in fact, she was. She lifted up off her feet, floating in mid-air with her arms dangling downwards. Her eyes were wide and pulsing, a long ribbon of drool slithering and dripping out of her confused open mouth.
Her legs twisted into knots, and she clasped her hands next to her cheek as she sighed. Throbbing love-hearts appeared at the centre of each of her swirling eyes, and more of them appeared above her head before popping like little soap bubbles.
``Yeah....'' Zyla agreed. ``I remember always.... Wantin' ta be a toon.''
``Right?'' Zaide purred. ``It always seemed so weirdly carefree, didn't it. No matter how violent or crazy it got, no one died or really got hurt. Everything resets in each new episode. Nothing lasts. Nothing changes.... That sounds great, doesn't it Zyla?''
``Yeah-huh...''
``Not a care in the world. No real pain, not in a meaningful sense. Just some harmless goofing around... right?''
``Yeah-huh, right-a-roonie...'' Zyla was grinning widely now, her teeth pale white, flat and uniform like piano keys.
``So... let's play for a while, shall we?'' Zaide stroked Zyla under her chin, and her tail spun like a propeller as her fingers and toes curled. ``We've got to give you some time to get used to your new body, don't we?''
``Hehehe, you betcha...''
``And then, you and I, Zyla old friend... we're gonna get up to some real mischief.''
-
Zaide could have done without the slobbering noises, but it was still the most enthusiastic beach-side paw-bath she'd ever had. She was dressed down into a pink swimsuit, content to lounge and be waited upon; the beach was hers after she sent the rest of them packing with an image of their worst nightmare. Child's play when you wanted a little privacy.
Ash was on her left paw, and Jenny was on her right.Their big pink tongues wagged and explored with aplomb, each one as big as her entire foot. As for Zyla, she was draped in Zaide's lap, showering her in over-eager kisses; she was covered with lipstick markings. It was hard to tire of the fox's enthusiasm, especially after a long day of larceny. After having `saved' a few more `babes', her three toony minions had turned her into a millionaire in the space of a day, and that was only counting the hard cash and not the sensitive documents she was now holding for ransom.
Diamond Tail's PHA began to beep and vibrate next to Zaide. She put her hand up to Zyra's face, letting the little fox smooch and smooch her palm-beans to her heart's content.
Jenny had taught her how to use this thing; after the first week of brainwashing the squirrel was more than eager to share her whole life with her new mistress. Zaide stared at the dark over-head map of the city, and saw flashing dots approaching from the north-west of her spot on the beach. They'd be here soon...
As fun as it was to have these silly things at her disposal, though, it was about time to take this new mindset one step further.
``All right, boy n' girls, listen up!'' She clapped her hands twice.
To Zaide's delight, the leopard, the squirrel and the fox all shot from their positions into a ram-rod straight parade. Helmets materialised on their heads as they pressed their right fingertips against their temple.
``MA'AM YES MA'AM!'' They barked. Zaide laughed with delight.
``You three are too much, I swear... anyway! You've had some fun getting a feel for your new powers, haven't you? And there's more fun to come. You aren't obeying the laws of reality any more... so what's wrong with getting rid of that morality of yours as well...?''
``Wh-what?'' The three of them looked genuinely concerned for a moment. That was expected. Until now, Zaide had let them see the world through technicolour goggles, seeing themselves as the happy protagonists even as they'd robbed banks and caused chaos. But it was time to really let them loose. It was time to wake them from their dreams, and let them embrace a more properly villainous lifestyle.
``No complaining now...'' Zaide smiled. Her left hand glowed as she clasped an invisible bottle. ``Do you see what I have here?''
Her illusions filled in the blanks for the three confused toons. A large, round-bottomed bottle with a big paper label on its base, full of an inky black liquid the consistency of stout.
``It's, uh...Evil... Juice. Evil Juice.'' Zaide suppressed a cringe. Was that too on-the-nose? Eh, those old cartoons tended to be. She tilted the beaker from side to side, letting the potion swirl inside it. ``One big gulp is all it'll take to make you the vilest villains this world has ever seen...''
``B-but!'' Jenny began to pipe up.
``Nooooo buts.'' Zaide lifted the `glass' over head, her fingers pinching the top of the neck. As she tilted and swung it from side to side, Jenny's eyes followed the pendulum motion.
``But, I...'' Jenny's eyes spiralled almost instantly, and her tongue lolled free from her mouth. ``Mlaaaah...''
``Strings!'' Zaide held out her paw, and in an instant Ash's chin was buried in it as he purred like a car engine. ``My good little kitty cat. You can be first.''
She squeezed his face, making his mouth open wide like a funnel, before she poured a shot into his open mouth. Suggestion could only do so much - as he coughed and squirmed and mewled, Zaide worked her magic to change up his look. His pink outfit went a few shades darker, turning a deeper crimson. The look was matched in his eyes, his blue eyes and black pupils replaced with two bright red pinwheels.
Ash chuckled darkly, his wicked grin spreading past the bounds of his face, his whiskers curling and twisting into something resembling a thin moustache.
``Bad Kitty,'' Zaide cooed, giving his chin a scratch. ``Such a bad kitty...''
``Ooh! My turn, my turn!'' Zyla raced forward and practically yanked the glass from Zaide's paw. She didn't mind the initiative. She simply watched the toony fox bend over backwards and take a big, hearty gulp.
``Baaaah!'' She exhaled, smoke pouring from her mouth as her outfit turned a similar shade to Ash's. ``Oooohoho, that's the stuff.''
``And Miss Diamond Tail?'' Zaide prompted, gesturing towards the drooling statue-like squirrel.
``Hehehehe... Yes Boss!!'' Zyla poured the last bit of the potion into Jenny's mouth. The squirrel sputtered and doubled over and coughed, before shooting upright with her eyes full of spirals and a toothy smile on her face.
``Now!'' Zaide stood up, clapping her paws together and rubbing them. ``This potion only lasts for a short time, just for a little taste of freedom. But it's going to last just long enough for you to deal with some interlopers.''
She looked along the beach, and could see the three figures approaching at speed - one zooming in on a broomstick, the other two dashing on foot.
``Four on three, huh?'' Ash said. ``Not gonna be a fair fight. But we don't play fair, do we?''
He cackled, and was shortly joined by the other two. With that, they were off to meet the heroes half-way. Diamond Tail was bouncing on her bungee-like namesake, Strings was running on all fours like a wild leopard, and Stormwave ran with her legs spinning like electric turbines.
Zaide followed close behind - their cartoonish strengths would not be worth much if these heroes didn't believe the illusion as well.
The three sets of fighters faced off, as Zaide approached from behind her minions. She could tell by their befuddled looks that her illusions were working. They were seeing their comrades as strange little rubber-hose gremlins. The looks on those three rubes' faces were like a drug. She also got another pleasant surprise. It looked as though the two heroes - the lithe white shark in the power suit and the feline witch in a mauve dress- had teamed up with Symphony in some sort of temporary alliance. That pretend pop-star snow leopard had been something of a rival to Zaide.
``I didn't know you turned over a new leaf, Symphony!'' Zaide cajoled.
The snow leopard scoffed. ``The enemy of my enemy is my friend.''
Symphony held her microphone up to her lips, but before she could sing or say a word, Strings snapped his fingers, and it simply blew up in her hand like a stick of dynamite. When the smoke settled, her face was completely black with soot, save for her eyes. The three toons shrieked with laughter, tears pouring from their eyes as they doubled forward.
Symphony looked down in shock at the crumbling microphone in her hand, a look of utter despair on her face. She almost looked like she was about to cry; that microphone must have meant something to her. In fact, as she fell to her knees, the outfit she had been wearing vanished, turning back into regular street clothes.
``Whoops, so much for that!'' Zaide joined in the laughter for a moment before she let her illusory powers cloak herself from their view entirely.
As Symphony fell to her knees, clutching at the destroyed bits of her microphone,
The snow-coloured shark took the initiative to lunge in and attack. Stormwave brought her paws up, her fingers pointing downwards like she was playing an organ, and lightning poured from them. It didn't seem to deter him at all; the electricity was simply absorbed into his suit, swirling and crackling around his limbs. He closed the gap with an electrified round-house kick. It connected with Jenny's side, making it bend and distend like a rubber band pulled taut. Before the shark could react, the leopard's body shot back the other direction. The shark's leg went flying from the force, taking the rest of him for a spin through the air.
The witch-cat took off into the air and began to chant, her voice layered with dark tones. The sand underneath the toons shifted and formed into massive hands, grabbing on tightly to the three of them and making their eyes bulge out like squeaky toys. She wasn't going to try and crush them, not wanting to hurt her compatriots, but she hoped they'd at least run out of air. Sure enough, their faces turned bright blue and their eyes grew comically bloodshot.
``Sorry about this,'' she muttered, before she gave one last squeeze to send them to dreamland.
She wasn't expecting them to shoot out of their super-suits like bananas out of their peels. They rocketed into the air, only dressed in black-and-white striped skivvies. Strings' gloves were still on, and little wires shot from the tips and wrapped around the witch-cat's broomstick. It felt slick all of a sudden, like it was being covered with oil.
``H-hey!'' She yelped with shock as she slipped off and began to plummet. She braced for impact against the soft sand, but instead found herself caught in the grip of two massive sandy fists. As she struggled against their crushing grasp, she managed to open her eyes to see the leopard thumbing nose at her atop her broomstick.
``I hacked your magic~'' he said with a sing song sneer. Immediately after that, Diamond Tail and Stormwave landed on either side of the restrained witch, smirking wickedly. From behind them, the witch-cat could see her partner approaching once again for another strike, having built up some momentum during their distraction.
Without looking, Stormwave grabbed Diamond Tail's tail, giving it a jolt. It puffed out and ballooned in size until it was about as thick as a brick wall. A shark-shaped indentation pushed through it with a loud whap. When the squirrel peeled her tail away, the shark was left suspended in the air for a moment, eyes rolling, his tongue lolling out, before he floated to the ground like a feather.
It was happening to him, too... The cat screamed and struggled, unable to free herself; she was the last one standing, wasn't she..?
``Tut tut, Mina...'' Zaide re-appeared, leaning against one of Mina's unruly sand-fists. ``You really disappointed me. I thought you and Kiyn would have lasted a bit longer. Angelica, well, she was an easy target - weren't you, Angie~?''
``Yes...'' the snow leopard marched up next to her, that cartoonish grin starting to creep across her face as her eyes swirled. Her movements were jerky and clockwork, her legs parallel to the sand each time she took a step. When she stopped, she shuddered a little like an automaton at a theme park.
``Damnit,'' Mina spat. ``You might think you've won. But my mind's a lot tougher to crack than the others...''
``Is it, now?'' Zaide laughed. She snapped her fingers, and Ash suddenly was at her side as well. ``Well, guess I'll have to go for the nuclear option..."
``The what?!'' Mina looked to the mesmerised leopard. He dug under the sleeve of his left glove, and slowly pulled out a round black bomb that was as big as his whole upper body. On it was a smiling portrait of Zaide.
``My patented Purr-ception Bomb!!'' Zaide said. ``Well, okay, not patented, I just made it up on the spot.
``Isn't this fun? I can just will anything I want into existence, and your warped minds accept it. I get to be the director of my own personal cartoon. And I think we could expand the roster a little...''
Mina's eyes went wide as dinner plates as she glanced down at the still-unconscious Kiyn.
``Kiyn, come on, wake up...''
``Please, no...!'' Kiyn raised his head up, his eyelids droopy and blackened. ``Mama, I don't wanna `nother bedtime story...'' His head drooped right back down into the grass, the stars still swirling and dancing in a halo around his ears..
``Well, I'm gonna step out of the blast radius.'' Zaide laughed and slowly walked back. ``Go for it, boys n' girls!''
``Yes Boss!'' Strings, Diamond Tail and Stormwave shouted in unison.
Diamond Tail's tail was singed at the tip by a little bolt of lightning from Stormwave (which made her yelp and slap the vixen in the face). She brought it to the fuse. The bomb was held just in front of the witch-cat's face as the fuse began to spark, taunting her and daring her to try to blow it out. The three laughed at her as she took deeper breaths each time, her stomach puffing out more and more, her eyes bulging out of their sockets, sweat pouring off her face in droves. The fuse grew shorter and shorter, inch by inch. Around the half inch mark, the laughter abruptly stopped.
``Hey, do you think we shoulda got outta range?'' Diamond Tail asked.
``May-`` Stormwave began, just before the bomb exploded.
Zaide watched the bright pink, sparkling mushroom cloud grow and curl into the sky - only about 30 feet, give or take. She didn't even really give much distance between the blast and herself; after all, it did nothing to her.
As for those erstwhile heroes...
As the pink smoke, all six of the `victims' were black silhouettes. Gradually, each of them opened their wide bulging eyes, blinking with the plinking sounds of a xylophone.
``Whooh!'' Kiyn was the first one to shake the soot away, his eyes two big black circles, his power-suit puffy and childlike. ``Do it again!''
Mina cackled like a witch - she looked the part with her long cloak and pointy hat - and began to speak in a sing-song rhyme.
``Double-Double Toil and Trouble! I thought we would be turned to rubble! But it seems to me Miss Zaide set us free...''
``Mmmh, yes,'' Symphony moaned, ``I must say that was... exhilarating.''
Symphony had lost her pop star outfit, taking on the appearance of a sultry lounge singer, with full lips, shadowed eyes and a long elegant dress. She took a step forward towards Zaide, her long bare leg slipping out from the slit of her dress.
Almost immediately, the other 5 buried themselves on all fours and began to rub and kiss every inch. Zaide would have been jealous, but she knew her new toony thrall knew her place. Besides, she couldn't blame them. The femme fatale look suited the snow leopard. Getting to corrupt her in particular was a very, very pleasant accident.
``How're the three of you feeling, my dear little creations?'' Zaide asked. ``Better now?''
``M-much better!'' Kiyn was leaving little shark-tooth marks on Symphony's leg with the pace and tones of a typewriter - she didn't seem too bothered, though.
``Good. Good! Now, I believe before you rudely interrupted us...'' Zaide rubbed her fingers together before snapping them once more. All six went on parade instantly. ``I was in the process of being pampered. Let's get back to that.''
Back in her lounging chair, Zaide now had four pairs of lips massaging and lapping at her feet - Strings, Stormwave, Diamond Tail and Kiyn. It didn't seem like Zyla minded being `demoted'. She was happy to please her old friend, even if she'd been replaced as the chief object of her affection.
As for Mina, she was stirring a little steaming cauldron, babbling some witchy nonsense in a shrill little whisper.
``Fizz and Froth, Some Sweet Nectar Broth! Abracadoo, some Sex-on-the-Beaches for you!''
With a sweet smoky puff, two colourful cocktails appeared in the lynx and the snow leopard's hands. Angelica was draped over Zaide like the arm candy she deserved to be. Zaide and Symphony clinked their glasses together, their pink swirling eyes meeting.
``To me,'' Zaide said with a grin. ``To my minions. And what's soon to be my toon-tinted city!''
``To you, darling,'' Angelica purred.
Zaide felt like it would have been a good time to wink at the camera, if there was one trained on her. She would just have to settle for taking a long drink from her glass, then tasting a bit more of it on the snow leopard's lips.
